New York Family Mediation Lawyer

Family disputes can be some of the most emotionally challenging experiences people go through. Whether it's a divorce, custody battle, or any other family-related issue, the process often involves difficult decisions that can impact your life and your family's future. Family mediation is an alternative way to resolve these issues outside of the court system. A New York family mediation lawyer can help you navigate this process and find solutions that work for you and your family, without the need for a lengthy and costly trial.

Family mediation is a process where a neutral third party, known as the mediator, helps individuals involved in a family dispute reach an agreement. The mediator does not take sides or make decisions for the parties involved. Instead, the mediator guides the conversation, helping both sides communicate more effectively and work through their issues. In family mediation, the goal is for both parties to reach a mutual agreement that addresses the concerns of everyone involved, without having to go to court.

Family mediation can be used in a variety of family-related disputes, including:

• Divorce, including spousal support and property division
• Separation agreements
• Child custody, including parenting plans and visitation
• Child support

It can also be helpful in resolving disagreements between family members, such as in cases of elder care or guardianship. In New York, family mediation is an option for those seeking an alternative to the adversarial, lengthy, and expensive litigation process.

Family mediation in New York is authorized under DRL § 240, which allows courts to refer parents to mediation in child custody cases, as well as in other family law matters. Mediation can be voluntary, meaning both parties agree to participate, or it can be court-ordered. In some cases, family mediation is also written into existing agreements, such as divorce decrees or separation agreements, where it is required as the first step before taking disputes to court. This helps reduce the potential for conflict and provides a more cooperative environment for resolving issues.

The steps in family mediation typically follow a structured process designed to help parties resolve their disputes. Here are the common steps involved:

1. Initial Consultation: The process starts with an initial meeting where the mediator explains the mediation process, including its goals, rules, and confidentiality. The mediator will also gather basic information from both parties about the family situation, such as custody, finances, or any other issues at hand. This is an opportunity for both parties to ask questions and understand the process.

   The goals of family mediation are generally very specific, helping to keep the process focused and organized. For example, in child custody cases, the goal may be to develop a parenting agreement that outlines how decisions will be made for the child, visitation schedules, and other essential details of parenting. In divorce cases, the goal may be to reach an agreement that covers property division, spousal support, and child support. These specific goals help ensure that discussions remain focused on finding solutions that meet the needs of both parties. By having clear objectives, mediation is able to move forward efficiently, allowing both sides to work towards an agreement that resolves their concerns without unnecessary diversion into unrelated issues. This targeted approach helps maintain a productive and less adversarial environment for both parties.

2. Agreement to Mediate: Both parties must agree to participate in the mediation process. This includes agreeing to work collaboratively toward a resolution and abiding by the mediator’s guidelines. A written agreement may be signed outlining the terms of the mediation, including the mediator’s role, confidentiality, and fees.
3. Setting the Agenda: The mediator will help the parties identify the key issues that need to be addressed. For example, if the goal is to create a parenting agreement, key issues to prioritize may include child custody, visitation schedules, decision-making responsibilities, and how to handle disputes between parents. If the goal is to reach a separation agreement, key issues might include property division, spousal support, and child support. The mediator may suggest areas to focus on and help prioritize the most important issues to ensure the mediation sessions stay on track. This step clarifies what needs to be resolved, allowing the parties to concentrate on the core issues and work towards a mutually agreeable solution.
4. Exchange of Information: Both parties will exchange necessary information, such as financial documents, details about the children, or any other relevant facts. The mediator will ensure that both sides have equal access to the information they need to make informed decisions.
5. Discussion and Negotiation: The mediator will facilitate discussions between the parties. Each party will have the opportunity to express their concerns, viewpoints, and desired outcomes. The mediator will guide the conversation to ensure it remains respectful and productive. This step often involves negotiation, where both parties try to reach compromises on the issues at hand.
6. Exploring Solutions: As part of the negotiation, the mediator will help the parties brainstorm potential solutions. The mediator may offer suggestions or help the parties think creatively about options that could work for everyone involved. The goal is to find mutually acceptable solutions that address the needs and concerns of both parties.
7. Reaching an Agreement: If both parties reach an agreement on all or some of the issues, the mediator will help them formalize the agreement in writing. This may include drafting a written mediation agreement or settlement document that outlines the terms and conditions of the resolution.
8. Review and Finalization: Once the agreement is reached, both parties will review the terms to ensure that they understand and agree to the conditions. If the mediation involves child custody or visitation, the agreement may be submitted to the court for approval. Once approved, the agreement becomes legally binding.
9. Follow-up (if needed): In some cases, the mediator may schedule a follow-up meeting to check on the progress of the agreement or address any unresolved issues. This step ensures that the parties are adhering to the terms of the agreement and helps resolve any further disputes if needed.

Family mediation is a flexible process that can be tailored to the needs of the parties involved. It is focused on collaboration, open communication, and finding solutions that work for everyone involved, especially when children are part of the family dynamics.

There are several reasons why family mediation can be a better option than going to court. One of the biggest benefits of mediation is that it is often quicker and less expensive than a trial. Court cases can take months or even years to resolve, which can be emotionally and financially draining. Mediation, on the other hand, can often be completed in just a few sessions, saving time and money. In addition, family mediation on average costs $5000-$9000, while litigating family issues in New York can cost at last 3x that much if not significantly more.

Another advantage of mediation is that it allows both parties to have more control over the outcome. In a court case, a judge makes the final decision. In mediation, the parties work together to find a solution that works for both of them. This can lead to more creative and customized solutions that are tailored to the needs of the family.

Mediation can also help reduce conflict and maintain relationships. Court cases can be highly adversarial, leading to long-lasting animosity between the parties involved. In contrast, mediation focuses on collaboration and communication, which can help preserve relationships, especially if children are involved. In child custody cases, for example, mediation can help parents work together to develop a co-parenting plan that is in the best interests of their children.

Finally, family mediation is confidential, which means that the discussions that take place during mediation cannot be used against either party in court. This allows for more open communication, as both parties know that what is said in mediation will remain private.

Family mediation can be a helpful option in many family law cases, but it may not be suitable for every situation. Here’s a breakdown of when family mediation might be appropriate and when it might not be.

• Your Case Might Be Appropriate for Mediation:
  • Both Parties Are Willing to Work Together: Mediation is most effective when both parties are committed to finding a resolution and are open to compromise. If both sides are motivated to reach an agreement, mediation can be an efficient and effective process.
  • Families with Children: Mediation is a good choice for parents who need to create or modify a parenting plan. In cases involving child custody and visitation, mediation allows parents to work together to develop a plan that is in the best interests of their children, without the need for a contentious and lengthy court battle. If parents are able to communicate effectively and are willing to cooperate, mediation can help reduce conflict and create an agreement that works for everyone involved.
  • Cooperative Disputes: Mediation is a good option for resolving conflicts where both parties are open to discussion and cooperation, such as property division or spousal support in divorce cases. The focus is on finding solutions through communication rather than legal battles.
• Your Case Might Not Be Appropriate for Mediation:
  • History of Abuse or Coercion: Mediation may not be suitable if there is a history of abuse or coercion between the parties. If one party feels threatened or unable to participate freely, mediation cannot provide the safe environment needed to resolve the issues. In these cases, litigation may be necessary to ensure the safety and rights of the affected party.
  • Unwillingness to Cooperate: If one party is unwilling to cooperate, mediation may not be productive. Mediation relies on both parties working together toward a common goal. If one party is not committed to participating in good faith, the process is unlikely to be successful.
  • Serious Concerns About Fairness: If there are serious concerns about fairness—such as one party hiding assets or intentionally misleading the other—mediation may not be effective. In such cases, it may be necessary to pursue legal action in court to protect both parties’ rights and ensure a fair outcome.
• Legal Issues May Not Be Appropriate for Mediation: Mediation is designed to resolve disputes through negotiation and compromise. However, legal issues such as complex financial disputes or legal matters that require formal court orders may not be appropriate for mediation. If the dispute involves complicated legal questions or requires legal interpretation, it is often best to address these matters through formal legal channels. For example, in Giraldo v. Gomez, 852 N.Y.S.2d 842 (N.Y. App. Div. 2008), the issue involved a relocation request. Relocation requests are generally determined based on a best interests of the child analysis. Thus, Appellate Division determined that mediation was not justified because the court had already properly considered the child's best interests in its determination regarding the relocation request.

If you are unsure whether family mediation is the right approach for your situation, it’s a good idea to consult an experienced New York family mediation lawyer.

If you are facing a family dispute and are considering mediation, Stephen Bilkis & Associates is here to help. Our experienced team of mediators and family law attorneys has extensive knowledge of the mediation process and can guide you through every step of the way. We understand the challenges that come with family disputes, and we are committed to helping you find solutions that work for you and your family. At Stephen Bilkis & Associates, we offer personalized legal services that are tailored to your specific needs. Whether you are dealing with child custody, divorce, or any other family law issue, our team can help you explore your options and make informed decisions. Contact us at 800.696.9529 to schedule a free, no-obligation consultation to discuss the details of your situation. We serve clients in Bronx, Brooklyn, Long Island, Manhattan, Nassau County, Queens, Staten Island, Suffolk County, and Westchester County.