New York Child Custody Lawyer

Stephen Bilkis & Associates is led by New York child custody lawyer Stephen Bilkis, who has nearly 30 years of experience handling child custody, visitation, divorce, and other family law matters in New York. The firm has handled more than 500 child custody cases, and its attorneys collectively have more than 300 years of legal experience.

When your relationship with your child is at stake, the uncertainty can affect nearly every part of your life. You may be worried about where your child will live, how much time you will spend together, who will make decisions about school and health care, or whether the other parent will try to limit your role in your child’s life. We start by learning how your family operates now, your history of caring for your child, the concerns that led to the custody dispute, and what you believe will provide your child with stability.

No two custody cases look the same. Some parents agree on most issues and need help turning their agreement into a clear, enforceable custody and parenting plan. Others disagree about where the child should live, how parenting time should be divided, whether a parent should be permitted to relocate with the child, or whether there are safety concerns in either household. Grandparents and other relatives may also seek custody in circumstances where a parent cannot provide appropriate care. An experienced New York child custody lawyer from our firm will explain how New York’s best-interests standard applies to your circumstances and develop a strategy based on the facts of your case and your goals for your child.

During his legal career, Stephen Bilkis has earned recognition from several legal organizations and attorney rating sites, including selection to the New York Super Lawyers list, a distinction limited to 5% of attorneys in the state. He has also received an Excellent rating from Avvo, recognition as a Top-Rated Lawyer by Justia, and recognition from Expertise.com and TopLawyer.com.

Types of Child Custody in New York

Hearing terms like “sole custody” and “joint custody” for the first time can be confusing, especially when you are trying to figure out what they mean for your everyday life with your child. At Stephen Bilkis & Associates, we start by explaining exactly what each type of custody would look like for your family. We then review your work schedules, your child’s routines, and your history of co-parenting to recommend the arrangement most likely to hold up over time.

New York recognizes two kinds of custody: legal and physical.

• Legal custody is the right to make major decisions about a child’s education, health care, and religious upbringing. With joint legal custody, parents make those decisions together. With sole legal custody, one parent makes them.
• Physical custody, sometimes called residential custody, is about where the child lives day to day. A child may live primarily with one parent while the other has regular parenting time, or the child may split time between both homes. Shared physical custody does not have to mean an exactly equal split.

One of the questions clients frequently ask us is whether an unmarried father can get custody in New York. He can, but he must first establish that he is the child’s legal father, either through a signed Acknowledgment of Paternity or an order of filiation from the Family Court. Once paternity is established, he has the same right to seek custody or parenting time as the mother.

How New York Courts Decide Custody

Many parents fear that a judge who has never met their child will make the most important decisions about their family’s future. Stephen Bilkis and his team work to make sure the court sees the full picture of your relationship with your child. That means gathering school and medical records, identifying witnesses such as teachers, coaches, and pediatricians, organizing messages between the parents, and preparing you to testify clearly and confidently.

New York does not favor mothers or fathers. Under the Domestic Relations Law, neither parent has an automatic right to custody, and every decision is based on the best interests of the child. Judges look at the whole family situation, including:

• Each parent’s ability to care for the child. The court considers who can provide a stable home and meet the child’s physical, emotional, and educational needs.
• The child’s relationship with each parent. A parent who has been the primary caregiver, or who has an especially close bond with the child, may have an advantage.
• The child’s wishes. Older and more mature children, particularly teenagers, usually have their preferences given more weight. However, there is no set age, and the court is not required to follow what the child wants.
• Each parent’s mental and physical health. Health matters when it affects a parent’s ability to care for the child.
• Willingness to support the other parent’s relationship. Courts look closely at whether a parent encourages, or interferes with, the child’s bond with the other parent.
• The ability to cooperate. Joint custody works only when parents can communicate and make decisions together. A history of serious conflict can make it less likely.
• Domestic violence or abuse. The court must consider proven allegations of domestic violence, and the child’s safety comes first.
• Work schedules and child care. The court looks at which parent is available to handle daily needs like school drop-offs, meals, and appointments.
• Siblings and extended family. Courts generally prefer to keep siblings together and to preserve important family relationships.

In Manhattan, custody cases that are not part of a divorce are generally heard at New York County Family Court, 60 Lafayette Street in New York City. Under Family Court Act § 651, the judge applies Domestic Relations Law § 240(1)(a), which requires custody to be decided based on the child’s best interests and directs the court to consider proven allegations of domestic violence. Family Court rules also call for a custody or visitation trial to be completed within 90 days once it begins, so we make sure your evidence and witnesses are ready well before the first hearing date. Preparation matters even more because of how busy the court is: in 2019, the New York City Family Court handled 53,260 custody and visitation cases, which leaves judges limited time with each family. Drawing on experience with more than 500 child custody cases, we present your case in a clear, organized way that helps the judge quickly understand your child’s needs and your role as a parent.

One of the questions clients frequently ask us is how a judge actually learns what the child wants. In many contested cases, the court appoints an attorney for the child, who meets with your child and shares the child’s views with the judge. Another common question is what happens while the case is still going on. The court can issue temporary orders setting where the child lives and when each parent has time with the child, and because courts value stability, a temporary arrangement can influence the final outcome, so we address it from the very start.

Visitation and Parenting Time in New York

If your child will live mostly with the other parent, you may worry about becoming a weekend visitor in your own child’s life. New York child custody lawyer from Stephen Bilkis and his team fight for meaningful, reliable parenting time. We draft detailed schedules that cover school weeks, holidays, birthdays, summer vacation, and transportation, which leaves far less room for arguments later.

In New York, a parent without primary physical custody is generally entitled to regular parenting time unless it would harm the child. The schedule can be agreed on by the parents or set by the court. When there are genuine safety concerns, such as a history of abuse, substance use, or a long absence from the child’s life, the court may order supervised visitation, where a neutral adult is present during visits.

One of the questions parents frequently ask us is whether they need a court order if they already agree on a schedule. We strongly recommend one, because an informal agreement cannot be enforced by the court if one parent stops following it. A written, court-approved agreement protects both parents and the child.

Modifying a Custody Order in New York

Life keeps moving after a custody order is signed, and an arrangement that made sense two years ago may no longer fit your child’s needs. Stephen Bilkis & Associates helps parents ask the court to update their orders and defends parents when the other side is seeking changes. We gather evidence showing what has changed, such as a new work schedule, a move, problems at school, or concerns about safety, and explain to the court why a new arrangement would serve the child better.

To modify an order, the parent requesting the change must show that circumstances have changed since the order was made and that the modification is in the child’s best interests. For example, in Hendershot v. Hendershot, 187 A.D.3d 1584 (N.Y. App. Div. 2020), the father lived in Canandaigua when the divorce judgment was issued, and the judgment gave him significant time with the children during the week. The mother moved back to Canandaigua from Albany at about that time. Afterward, the father began attending college in Ithaca and living there during the week, leaving the children in the paternal grandmother’s care while he was away. The children, who were 12 and 14, also said they wanted more time with their mother. The trial court increased the mother’s time, and the Fourth Department upheld the increase, finding that the parents’ moves, along with the children’s wishes, amounted to a change in circumstances.

Relocating With a Child After a Custody Order in New York

A new job, a new relationship, or better schools can make a move feel like the right decision, but relocating with a child after a custody order is rarely simple. The experienced New York child custody lawyers at our firm represent parents who want to move and parents who want to prevent a move. We prepare evidence about the reasons for the move, how the new schools compare, travel logistics, and a revised parenting schedule that keeps the child connected to both parents.

If a move would significantly affect the other parent’s time with the child, or if the custody agreement restricts where the parent can live, the relocating parent generally needs either the other parent’s written consent or the court’s permission. The court weighs the reasons for the move, its impact on the child’s relationship with the other parent, and whether it would improve the child’s life. Even a short move can be denied if it would disrupt a parent who is heavily involved in the child’s everyday life.

For example, in H.K. v. R.C., 2021 NY Slip Op 21190, the parents’ agreement barred the mother from moving out of Manhattan without the father’s consent or a court order. When the father refused to consent, the mother asked the court for permission to move with their son from the Upper West Side to Scarsdale, about 20 miles away. The father, who lived in Livingston, New Jersey, saw the child on alternate weekends and for one weeknight dinner, and his main objection was a longer drive. The mother also offered to take over some of the driving. The court allowed the move, finding that it would not meaningfully change the father’s parenting time and that it was in the child’s best interests.

Grandparents’ Custody and Visitation Rights in New York

Grandparents who have helped raise a grandchild can feel shut out and powerless when a parent suddenly cuts off contact. Stephen Bilkis and his team stand up for grandparents seeking visitation or custody, as well as parents responding to those petitions. We document the grandparent’s relationship with the child through photos, caregiving history, school pickups, and testimony from people who have seen that bond firsthand.

Grandparents can ask for visitation if a parent has died or if the circumstances show the court should step in, which usually means the grandparent has a real, ongoing relationship with the child. The court then decides whether visitation is in the child’s best interests, giving significant weight to the wishes of a fit parent. Custody is much harder to obtain. A grandparent must first show extraordinary circumstances, such as a parent’s abandonment or unfitness, or a long period in which the child lived with the grandparent.

For example, in Linda UU. v. Dana VV., 212 A.D.3d 906 (N.Y. App. Div. 2023), a grandmother and mother shared joint legal custody, with the child living at first mainly with the grandmother and later with both. As their relationship grew more contentious, each of them sought sole custody. The Family Court awarded sole custody to the mother, and the Appellate Division affirmed, explaining that a grandparent can be awarded custody over a parent only in extraordinary circumstances. The mother had consistently fulfilled her parental responsibilities, and the grandmother’s allegations were not enough to show neglect, unfitness, or any other extraordinary circumstance. The grandmother was, however, granted visitation.

How to Enforce a Child Custody Order in New York

Few things are more frustrating than arriving for your parenting time and being turned away, or learning that the other parent made a major decision about your child without you. Stephen Bilkis & Associates acts quickly when a custody order is being ignored. We help you document each violation with dates, messages, and witnesses, and then file a petition asking the court to step in.

Common violations include denying parenting time, failing to return the child on time, and making major decisions without the parent who shares legal custody. Depending on the circumstances, the court may order make-up time, change the custody arrangement, or hold the violating parent in contempt. A pattern of interference can also hurt that parent in future custody decisions.

If a client came to us after the other parent had canceled several weekend exchanges in a row and stopped answering texts, our approach would be to start a written log of every missed exchange right away, preserve the messages showing the client was ready and on time, and send a clear written request that the schedule be followed. If the interference continued, we would file a violation petition asking for make-up time and, where the pattern justified it, a change to the custody arrangement.

Request a Free, No-Obligation Consultation with Stephen Bilkis & Associates

If you are involved in a custody dispute or need to change or enforce an existing order, contact an experienced New York child custody lawyer at Stephen Bilkis & Associates today for a free consultation at 800.696.9529. Tell us about your family, whether a custody order or court date is already in place, and what arrangement you hope to reach for your child. We will discuss your situation and identify the next steps that may be available. Early action matters, because the parenting schedule in place while a case is pending can shape the final custody decision.

Stephen Bilkis & Associates is led by Stephen Bilkis, whose work on behalf of New York families has been recognized by his peers and by independent rating organizations. His professional honors and ratings include selection to the New York Super Lawyers list, which recognizes the top 5% of attorneys in the state. He is also rated Excellent by Avvo and has been recognized as a Top-Rated Lawyer by Justia, as well as by Expertise.com and TopLawyer.com. Stephen Bilkis & Associates represents clients throughout New York City, including Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, the Bronx, and Staten Island, as well as Nassau County, Suffolk County, Westchester County, and other communities in the New York area.